Wednesday, November 30, 2011

California's latest landslide wins November 2011 Best Landslide by a landslide

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Los Angeles--The votes are in: Landslide Magazine's November award winner for Best Landslide is California's latest landslide, whic...
Monday, November 28, 2011

Reid not deterred by latest loss: Coach will continue to harass local Applebee's manager with 'great' Scrapplebee's idea

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Wednesday, November 23, 2011

New 1-900 number allows concerned fans to get latest info on NBA lockout

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Sunday, November 20, 2011

Dessert-minded Occupy faction breaks away to form Occu-pie

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Philadelphia--Wayne O'Brien took two big whiffs of the freshly-baked apple pie resting in his chafed, raw hands. Then, slowly looking s...
Thursday, November 17, 2011

Scrap yard owner on why he never questioned patron who regularly brought in manhole covers, street signs for cash: 'He said they were his'

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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Reid putting positive spin on Vick's latest injury: 'It reminded me of the sandwich in my bottom right desk drawer'

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The mobile quarterback broke two ribs versus Cardinals Eagles head coach Andy Reid told a room full of reporters at Monday's weekly day...
Monday, November 14, 2011

McNamara on surfing 90-foot wave: 'Testicles still up inside body somewhere'

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Friday, November 11, 2011

U.S. Coast Guard officially changes old nautical saying: 'Red sky at night, sailor's just might'

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The popular sailor's adage, "Red sky at night, sailor's delight," has officially been changed by the United States Coast ...
Sunday, November 6, 2011

Rooney's death eliminates long wait for the thousands on nation's eyebrow transplant list

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Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Netflix CEO cancels subscription to Netflix

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Los Gatos, CA--Reed Hastings, CEO of movie streaming and dvd-through-mail provider Netflix, after endless wavering, has finally decided to c...
Friday, October 28, 2011

Popular haunted house making 'serious money' from diaper vending machine positioned at entrance

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Terror Behind the Walls literally cashing in from scaring the crap out of people

Netflix CEO on losing 800,000 subscribers since price hike: 'It's probably more like 900,000'

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Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Game 6 postponed: Rain forces MLB to schedule first-ever World Series day-night doubleheader

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Monday, October 24, 2011

Report: FOX begged Nowitzki to throw first 4 innings for Rangers

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Network offered basketball star appearance on Bones Above: Dallas Mavericks star Dirk Nowitzki throws the ceremonial first pitch before ga...
Sunday, October 23, 2011

Libyan rebels confirm they have finally gained control over Gaddafi's Facebook page

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Angry mob having "loads of fun" updating the deceased dictator's profile
Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Braves feeling less pressure to change name now that Thrashers are gone

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Atlanta, GA--The NHL season is finally underway and there is no team more thankful than the Atlanta Braves. Huh? Say what? Before the Thras...
Friday, October 14, 2011

Rival Mummer clubs unite after prostitution scandal, promise to quintuple alcohol intake on New Year's Day as a gift to parade revelers

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Philadelphia--Rival Mummers clubs have come together after the recent prostitution scandal by well-known club the Downtowners to assure the...

Phillies say disappointing playoff run 'has totally dampened' trip to Fiji

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Fiji--The team, visiting this paradise island in the Pacific for three weeks, says the early playoff exit has made the tropical drinks here ...
Monday, October 10, 2011

Flyers' Jaromír Jágr has message for suffering Phillies and Eagles fans: Ukončete výstup a nástup, dveře se zavírají!

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Thursday, October 6, 2011

Cardinals seriously mulling Quint's offer to find, catch, kill stadium squirrel

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St. Louis--He appeared out of nowhere, startling the Cardinals distraught front office members who had gathered late-night in an empty Bus...
Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Old-timey photograph proves St. Louis Arch was designed, constructed by humans ... for some reason

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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Vick to wear mini Beebe helmet on injured right hand

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Philadelphia--In an effort to protect his injured right hand, Eagles quarterback Michael Vick will wear a miniature Don Beebe helmet during ...
Saturday, September 24, 2011

Will the single shell coxswain soon be joining the dinosaurs?

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The shouts from the middle of the slow moving river glide over the water startling the Canada geese fertilizing the lush parkland that lines...
Friday, September 23, 2011

Report: More than half of Brewers players dabble unsuccessfully in home brewing

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St. Louis--Ryan Braun turned red with embarrassment when a local St Louis reporter asked the All-star outfielder if he brewed his own beer. ...
Friday, September 16, 2011

Small Pennsylvania town convinced that lone British resident is voice behind Geico's Gecko

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Lumberton City, PA--Residents of this sleepy, tucked-away town in, ironically, Pennsylvania coal country have been buzzing over a new arriv...
Sunday, September 11, 2011

Concussed Utley recovering slowly, remembers being hit by pitch but has 'no recollection of hitting .262 this season'

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Chase Utley sat quietly behind a tabletop podium responding to queries from a small gathering of local press members seeking information on...
Saturday, September 10, 2011

Brewers would love to forget inaugural season when they were known as the Fermentationers

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Milwaukee, WI--Jake O'Neil, the original owner of the Brewers , can (sort of) laugh about it today when asked to reflect on the club...
Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Philippine villagers pretty much feel they captured what was eating their elephants and water buffaloes

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Saturday, September 3, 2011

Marlins generally discourage fans from counting before guessing the game's attendance on stadium JumboTron

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Team says 'that's cheating'
Thursday, September 1, 2011

77 of 78 chemicals used in hydraulic fracturing also found in Twinkie cream filling

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