Vatican confirms Pope will visit Pat's AND Geno's

In March, a delegation of Philadelphians traveled to Vatican City to extend a personal invitation to Pope Francis to visit the city during the World Meeting of Families in September 2015. In addition to personalized jerseys from all four major sports franchises, the distinguished group presented His Holiness with a two-day-old cheesesteak brought over on the flight to Italy in a styrofoam organ donor cooler. (They did not disclose where the steak was purchased.) Francis accepted the gifts with a wide grin and the Brotherly Love representatives moved on after a brief interaction. "I didn't think he would eat the cheesesteak to be perfectly honest," said an incredulous Mayor Michael Nutter. "I was floored when I got the call last week. I thought it was a prank." The Call was directly from the Pope himself asking which cheesesteak establishment he should patronize during his visit next fall. Nutter politely guided Francis to sample several steak shops because it is "very difficult to choose just one." Last week, the Vatican confirmed that the Pope would visit Pat's and Geno's in South Philadelphia and possibly two more shops during the brief stay.

7 feet of snow: Buffalo area school districts forced to grant first two-hour delay opening in 78 years

Above: A wall of snow moves inland from unfrozen Lake Erie in western New York state on November 18, 2014. Parts of Erie, Cattaraugus, and Chautauqua Counties, south of Buffalo, received nearly seven feet of snow from the intense, slow-moving band of precipitation. The region, which annually receives huge amounts of lake effect snow, was forced to open schools two hours late during the most intense part of the storm. "I think seven feet of snow is enough to have a two-hour delayed opening," said Eileen McAntyre, Superintendent of Hamburg (NY) Area School District. "[Residents of western New York] are used to snow and I really hope I don't come across as a wimp for opening two hours late. It's been 78 years since the last delayed school opening in this area." 

Packers 53, Eagles 20: Frustrated Birds fan stares at Bobby Hoying figurine on fireplace mantle, shouts something about butt fumble before storming out of house

Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Michael Bay simultaneously texted smiley faces to each other at moment spacecraft Philae landed on comet

'Things are going pretty good,' says man who just cut open toothpaste tube to get last bit of toothpaste...then probably use as shot glass

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World Series: Pence, Bumgarner urging celebrating Giants fans to disperse from overloaded Golden Gate Bridge

Above: Social media led hundreds of thousands of Giants fans to converge on the Golden Gate Bridge soon after the team's victory parade ended in downtown San Francisco on Friday, October 31, 2014. Engineers became concerned after the curved roadway began to flatten and pleaded with authorities to disperse the crowd as quickly as possible. San Francisco Police and Marin County officials called on Giants players to help out and ask the fanatics to peacefully vacate the 77-year-old suspension bridge. Outfielder Hunter Pence and pitcher Madison Bumgarner appeared in a 60-second television public service announcement earlier today: "Hey, guys. Yeah, you guys on the bridge. We want you all to enjoy the World Series and celebrate responsibly. So, could you do us a favor and get off the bridge. Please, get off the bridge. All you have to is...get off the bridge. Hey, you there on the bridge...get off the bridge." The two stars of the championship series then turned "Get off the Bridge" into a catchy jingle and promised "Get off the Bridge" t-shirts for all who...get off the bridge.