A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond. (All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Saturday, January 30, 2016
Report: Temple seeking to partner with Oakland Raiders on 65,000-seat, retractable-roof stadium in North Philadelphia
North Philadelphia--Several transit riders spotted Mark Davis exiting the Broad Street Subway at the Cecil B. Moore Station yesterday on the Temple University campus, where a man standing on the platform in a dark suit held a sign that read, "M. Davis." The two quickly climbed into a waiting Cooper Mini limousine at the surface and drove north on Broad St. Davis is the majority owner of the Oakland Raiders, son of legendary late owner, Al Davis. The Bay Area team team is looking for a new stadium, and a recent proposal to return the organization (as well as the Chargers) to Los Angeles is apparently dead. Yesterday, Temple officials half-heartedly denied reports that the university was looking to partner with the Raiders on a 65,000-seat, retractable-roof stadium at the center of campus (map above). "[Temple] loathes the situation at the Linc, so why would we seek out another NFL team?" said one school official, referring to the current lease agreement with the Eagles in South Philadelphia at Lincoln Financial Field. The report also hinted that a retractable roof is desired--by a certain school president--to make Temple a legitimate candidate to host future Super Bowls. Notes: The new Snohetta-designed library may be located at the site of the former William Penn High School. The planned expansive campus green will be located in Fairmont Park.
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
Capella University to shelf new online music school: A Capella University
The world's first online a cappella music school will be shut down at the conclusion of the fall semester. Low enrollment and complaints of "jam sessions feeling way too distant" are behind the closure.
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Major ice, snow storm topples Quinnipiac University pole
The twenty-foot pole had stood on the campus of over 8,000 students for several decades. The university promises to conduct a poll on whether or not to bring the pole back.
Friday, January 3, 2014
Report: Lehigh Univ. president gave hints of departure: driving on left side of road, asking friends to 'high tea,' using 'mental'
Bethlehem, PA--Alice P. Gast is stepping down as president of Lehigh University, a position she has held since 2006, and moving into the top role at Imperial College London. Lehigh students and faculty claim the lead administrator began leaving hints of her departure weeks ago. "Last week, out of the clear blue, she began speaking in a British accent during a brief phone conversation," said one longtime faculty member. "It caught me off guard but now it makes perfect sense." Friends say that Gast began consuming and stockpiling "absurd" amounts of tea, referred to dinner as "high tea," and peppered meetings with the term "mental." There have also been reports that the president has been spotted driving on the left side of the road in and around the mountainside University. However, the clearest indication that the president was lining up a move to the other side of the Atlantic came with the installation of twenty-five bright red phone booths all over campus in early December.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)



