Sixers announce 'Tank' Night for March 17

Philadelphia--The Sixers announced the latest addition to the 2015-16 promotional schedule at the Wells Fargo Center will take place on March 17, versus the Washington Wizards. No, not green backboards or green rims to celebrate St Patrick's Day. Rather, to mark the 32nd anniversary of the release of the critically acclaimed film Tank, the Sixes will hold "Tank Night." On March 16, 1984, Tank hit the big screen featuring stars: James Garner, C. Thomas Howell, Jenilee Harrison, Shirley Jones, G. D. Spradlin, and James Cromwell, to name a few. The film received thirty-seven Oscar nominations, and took home thirty-six statues. All fans ages fifteen and over will receive a C. Thomas Howell 76ers jersey. The actor will take part in the ceremonial jump ball to begin the game by tossing the ball from the turret of a 1944 Sherman tank at center court. At halftime, 600 lucky fans will have the chance to help pull the 30-ton, WWII relic the length of the court via steel cable. The team also announced that to "fire up the crowd" during the game, the Jumbotron will show the movie clip with C. Thomas Howell saying. "He's my dad, and I love him. And if anyone tries to hurt him...I will blow them away." ("Sixers" will be dubbed over "dad.") Jenilee Harrison and Jennifer Garner--no relation to James--will launch "Sixers Tanking" t-shirts into the crowd throughout the first and third quarters.

Sixers win: Combined with Cavs loss, team pulls to within 19 games of first

Holiday party guests definitely noticed Sixers ornament on lower branch at back of tree

"I moved the ornament before the party started, but I think everyone saw it. I heard people whispering," said one party host.

Embiid tweets image of foot X-ray: Sixers, fans, foot screwed

Sixers coping: Team treating losing streak like winning streak, but not the good kind of winning streak

"We're trying to look at this losing streak like a winning streak...so that it's a little bit easier to deal with," said one player about the club's sixteen losses in a row. "But, it's the kind of winning streak that you want to end. I know that sounds weird, but it helps...a little bit. It makes us sound like we've won sixteen straight. Does that make sense?"

Sixers finally win a game: Team ends 0-0 record with impressive win over defending champs

Before the game, the team held a very embarrassing 0-0 record. "That 0-0 record was tough, but it's over now and we don't have to answer any more questions about it," said first-year Sixers coach Brett Brown.

Siren song of the Barclays Center: Devils, Rangers, Knicks moving to Brooklyn

Brooklyn--Move over Nets. Watch your step Islanders. A few new housemates are moving in. The brand new Barclays Center is apparently the place to be these days in the metropolitan New York sporting world.

Several months ago, the Islanders announced they would move from Nassau County to Brooklyn beginning in 2015. The team was unable to secure a new, much-needed facility on the Island. (Technically, Brooklyn is on the western tip of Long Island, so...)

Yesterday, the Devils, Rangers, and Knicks all announced plans to move from their current home arenas to Flatbush Avenue and Atlantic Avenue in Brooklyn, New York City's most populous borough with 2.5 million people (roughly the same size as Chicago).

The Devils move from Newark may be the most surprising of the three teams given that the Prudential Center, the team's home stadium, was completed only in 2007. The Prudential Center was meant to keep the team in New Jersey for "a friggin' longtime."

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie called the Devils' move "cowardly," but added that his focus was still on Superstorm Sandy recovery. Christie said that once Sandy work was complete he would attempt to lure the Phoenix Coyotes to North Jersey.

Police raid 76ers intern's apartment, discover hordes of Chicago Bulls voodoo dolls

Intern claims: 'I studied history at Tulane and nothing else, I swear.' Detectives will not say which Bull will be injured today.

NBA unsure why Mavericks' gear selling like hotcakes in northeastern Ohio

New York, NY--NBA league officials in Manhattan cannot explain why Dallas Mavericks' jerseys, sweatpants**, foam coolies, cups, barbecue grill covers, spatulas, lawn chairs, posters, t-shirts, jackets, hats, visors, windshield shade covers, frisbees, beach towels, key chains, mailboxes and automobile magnet flags--basically, anything with a Mavericks logo slapped on it--have been selling like wildfire over the past few days in and around Cleveland. "I don't get it," said Ralph Ventsini, head of apparel and merchandise supplies for the NBA, and who also tracks movement and sales nationwide. "We can't send enough Mavericks stuff to northeastern Ohio right now. I send it and it sells even before it leaves the truck. I thought they were Cavalier fans out there. One minute they are buying Sixers stuff, then Celtics gear and then Bulls gear. It's the most bizarre thing."

**Greater Clevelanders purchase more sweatpants per capita than any other city on the planet.

Iverson on arriving in Turkey with huge bowl of gravy: 'I thought ... well, let's just say there was a misunderstanding.'

Philadelphia Sixems? Desperate for revenue, Eastern Mountain Sports to sponsor fledgling team

Philadelphia, PA--Until now, most of North America's major professional sports leagues have avoided placing direct advertising on players' jerseys. Instead, leagues like the NFL and NBA have opted for more game-interrupting television commercials than to "ruin the integrity of the game." This long run of pristine uniforms, however, is about to come to an abrupt end.

With thousands of empty seats in the Wells Fargo Center during each Sixers' home game and perennially looking up at all the teams in the Atlantic Division standings, the 76ers, with approval of the National Basketball Association, have accepted a large sum of money from Eastern Mountain Sports (EMS), a New Hampshire-based outdoor apparel and recreation equipment retailer, to display the company's logo, and, at the same time, change the name of the team.

The club will officially change its name to the Philadelphia 76ems, or Sixems, tomorrow during a news conference.

"All that we're really doing is replacing the 'r' with an 'm'," said Debra Papadakis, the Sixems president of marketing. "It's pronounced just like it's spelled: Six-ems. Not Six-e-m-s, but Sixems. It's kind of catchy. Go Sixems!"

"Hey, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do," said Sixems head coach, Doug Collins. "I will always bleed Sixems red, white and blue."

"I've been a huge Sixems fan my whole life," said Doug Glonovich, 57, from Marcus Hook, PA, sporting a new camping headlamp. "If this deal means that winning ways are just over the horizon, than I'm all for it. Let EMS light up the way."

The league has been concerned for years about the direction of this once storied franchise that hasn't captured a championship since 1983, but has had such greats as Wilt Chamberlain, Julius Erving, Bobby Jones, Charles Barkley and Allen Iverson, to name a few, wear the red, white and blue (or, sadly, gold and black).

"The Sixems are a struggling franchise right now," said NBA Commissioner David Stern, donning a North Face Men's Nuptse Down Jacket inside a climate-controled conference room at the league's headquarters in New York. "In fact, this jacket has high loft goose down, which has a longer lifespan than most synthetic insulations. Not to mention, the miniripstop 50-denier nylon shell coupled with the double-layer taffeta on the shoulders for abrasion resistance."

The commissioner appeared truly concerned about the sad state of the club as his press conference continued. "This parka features a straighter yoke across the chest and a markedly improved, more flattering fit. It conveniently has a taffeta emergency hood and sports an internal zip stow pocket."

Emotions, surprisingly, started flowing from the league's headman as he paused for nearly a minute, gathering himself at the podium. "This jacket also has two hand pockets, velcro adjustable cuff tabs, hem cinch-cord and is zip-in compatible with many TNF shells. It thrives in cold weather conditions and is made with 700-fill goose down."

Spectrum statues to be relocated in front of planned mall Sunglass Hut

Above: A rendering of the new location of the Spectrum's statues at PhillyLive!'s future Sunglass Hut.

South Philadelphia--As preparation for the demolition of the Spectrum continues, workers removed the bronze statues around the outside of the hallowed arena on Friday with the help of cranes and straps. Among the works of art being relocated are the Kate Smith statue, Julius Erving statue and the "Score" statue--a tribute to Gary Dornhoefer's 1973 goal against the Minnesota North Stars. Yesterday, it was announced that a new location for the metal likenesses had been chosen. Philly Live! (pictured below), the new shopping and entertainment venue planned for the site, recently reached a lease agreement with Sunglass Hut, the world's largest sunglasses store which can be found in most malls and airports around the globe. "This economy is tough," said Ed Snider, Chairman of Comcast Spectacor, tears streaming from under his new black-framed sunglasses. "To bring tenants into Philly Live! we have to go the extra mile. As part of the contract, Sunglass Hut requested that the statues, which are all near and dear to my heart, be positioned in front of the new store once completed. Is this the ideal location? No, but we need to fill these commercial spaces." The eyewear company is foreseeing thousands of photos being taken by visiting fans of the statues with the store in the background, which, they hope, will act as free advertising.

Dalembert grateful that both Sixers' fans answered donation request

S. Phila bar owner: Hornets fans no longer welcome

Since 1988 Mack McMikes Pub in South Philadelphia at the corner of Snyder Ave and 9th St has been considered a Hornets bar. Hornets fans, initially just a handful, gathered here when the team was officially added to the National Basketball Association in April of 1987. By 1991 the Philadelphia Area Hornets Fan Club had officially named McMikes as the team's home bar.

"Mostly transplants from Charlotte and the Outer Banks to Philly and the Delaware Valley," said bar owner Rudy Krygle when asked where exactly the Hornets fans were coming from. "Even though Charlotte has a new team (the Bobcats) a lot of our Hornets fans are from the Carolinas."

When the team moved to New Orleans in 2002 many of the area's loyal Hornets fans from Tobacco Road continued to meet at Mack McMikes along with a brand new contingent from the bayou.

Hurricane Katrina added to the crowd at McMikes in 2005 when several hundred of the storm's victims were relocated to Philadelphia and wanted a taste of home by watching their NBA team. The devastating category five hurricane eventually forced the team to relocate again, though temporarily, to Oklahoma City. The franchise's third city in three years pushed the bar's maximum capacity of 200 persons to the limit for most Hornets games as area Oklahoma transplants found their way to South Philly.

The somewhat rowdy crowd has been an enormous boost to Krygle's business. Though he takes some heat from other neighborhood bar owners who support the local teams—Eagles, Phillies, Flyers, Sixers and Kixx—Krygle is happy how things have turned for his bar since 1988. Or at least he was.

Last night the New Orleans Hornets were in town and their Delaware Valley supporters were hyped up. The Philadelphia/Tri-state Area Hornets Fan Club, lead by David Jimms formerly of Tulsa, Oklahoma, organized a pregame meal and rally at McMike's and were also hosting the Oklahoma City Hornets Fan Club.

"[The Hornets Fans] were way too energetic for a regular season game," said Krygle. "I've seen them energized for the playoffs, but this was off the hook. I had a bad feeling."

An Orlando Magic fan in town for Saturday's tilt against the Sixers and stranded by Sunday's Nor'easter decided to crash the party.

"Magic fans can be a lot like Eagles fans, very passionate and loyal and very in-your-face. It was like mixing oil and oil," said Jimms.


Suddenly, without any warning, an argument erupted which had been brewing slowly all evening. Several Hornets fans began pummeling the Magic fan with no-longer-available Oklahoma City Hornets foam fingers. Witnesses said the Magic fan kept referring to Hornets star Chris Paul as Paul Chris purposely. Police were called to the scene and made several arrests further preventing many fans from reaching the game and joining the reported 14,299 fans at the Wachovia Center.

"I've had it with Hornets fans," said Krygle. "They're like really bad Utah Jazz fans and Sacramento Kings if they formed an evil robotic robot."

One Phils bandwagon fan swears team made it this far in 2001

Philadelphia is savoring last night's NLCS clincher that has put the Phillies in the World Series for only the 6th time in franchise history. Fans filled Broad Street, gathered in Mayfair and near Citizens Bank Park.

"I'm going crazy," said Zack Mendenhall, 36, a fan from Pennsport,"It's like 2001 all over again."

A face-painted Mendenhall admitted that he is a huge Eagles and Flyers fan, but only a very casual Phillies fan. When asked what was the significance of 2001 for the Phillies he gave a confused look.

"Everybody knows the Phils went to the finals in 2001. Remember the great play where Mike Lieberthal stepped over a player on his way to home plate. We're celebrating like it's been a lot longer than seven years, but that's fine with me," said Mendenhall.

When several friends and diehard fans tried to explain to Mendenhall that it was the Sixers who made it to the finals in 2001 and Allen Iverson who stepped over a Los Angeles Laker he became very quiet.

The Pennsport native insisted it was the Phils in the "MLB Finals" that year. There were lots of finger pointing, name calling and some tears during the debate about the Phils 2001 season.

"It's so clear to me because it was a few days after my birthday in June and ... Oh god. Oh %$#@! I'm very embarrassed. You probably can't tell that I'm bright red because of all this red paint I have on my face."

Sixers will hold a night to honor Webber

The Philadelphia 76ers have announced that they will be conducting a promotion involving Webber Grills either at an upcoming game or early next season. The team expressed interest in a "first 500 fans" type of night. The give-away would likely be coupons toward a Webber Grill or perhaps a chance to win a grill at halftime. "We're excited. We think it'll be a great night to honor one of the best grills in the business. You can always count on this Webber. This Webber comes to cook every night. It's a dependable product," said Sixers marketing director, David Mulley.

Sixers, Flyers, Eagles, Phils consider relocation after latest skyscraper proposal

Philadelphia's four major professional sports teams-Flyers,Sixers,Eagles,Phils-are now considering relocation after news broke about a planned 1500 ft skyscraper to be constructed at 18th and Arch Streets in Center City.

Relocation talk sprouts from the "Curse of William Penn"-the belief that no Philadelphia team has won a championship since the modern skyline passed the brim of William Penn's hat atop City hall in 1987. The Sixers were the last team to capture a title in 1983 the same year that city officials agreed to permit buildings to breakthrough Penn's ceiling.

There was no official law limiting the height of the city's buildings but several architects were put to death for proposing such plans. Renown Philadelphia architect Gilbert Torchester was hung in 1906 in the City Hall court yard for mentioning to a friend that,"one day I will look down on William Penn."

The four teams believe that the curse is confined to the city limits and therefore plan on moves to one of the surrounding Pennsylvania or New Jersey counties.

"It stinks because we just got a new stadium," said David Montgomery, Phillies president. Already the town of Cape May, NJ seems to be the frontrunner for landing the Phils as they have plans for a 40,000-seat stadium in the heart of the historic district. "We'll have to rid the town of some of these hideous Victorian homes, but I think we can get it done," said Cape May Borough Chair, Tara Freeman.

Chester County has contacted the Eagles about a possible stadium site in the Great Valley Corporate Center with easy access to the Pennsylvania Turnpike and Route 202.

"This stinks because we just got a new stadium," said Jeffrey Lurie, Eagles owner. Lurie was very excited about the Chester County site but wanted to consider all the options.

"The curse is serious business which is why relocation is serious business. Having to move stinks because the Wachovia Center is only 12 years old," said Flyers president, Ed Snider. Reading and Norristown seem to be very interested in the Sixers and Flyers respectively.

Penn Movie to take different route

After several test screenings of various scenes from William Penn the movie, director Clyde Fulston has decided to meet with writers to change the story.

"The reception from the few scenes that we have filmed was very...lukewarm," said Fulston.

Currently the story has the William Penn statue atop City Hall coming to life after being struck by lightning and becoming a hero by fighting crime and helping the less fortunate.

The story will now have the 37 foot Penn come alive to personally help end the professional sports championship drought in Philadelphia. Penn feels very guilty about the curse and wants to make amends to the city he founded nearly 400 years ago. He joins all four of the major sports teams in the city and ends up dominating their respective leagues.

As a member of the Sixers he goes up against Shaq only to humiliate the all-star Miami center. He finishes second in the league in rushing as a running back for the Eagles. Pitching his way to a Cy Young award for the Phillies, he in turn ruins pitching mounds across the league. He struggles somewhat on the Flyers because of his weak skating skills, but as a goalie yields only 4 goals the entire season. The four teams become dynasties for the next 15 years.

One scene has a sobbing Penn being consoled by Mayor Nutter about the new skyline surpassing his hat. Fulton would not give away the ending, but said, "he puts another crack in a local symbol of freedom."

King: "I completely forgot I traded Iverson last year."

The Philadelphia 76ers fired Billy King, their president since 2003 and general manager since 1998. King admitted that he developed a plan over this past off-season to rebuild the Sixers, but that his plan included Allen Iverson. He was very excited coming into this season.

"I came into training camp and didn't see Allen and I immediately thought that he was skipping practice again," said King.

He called Iverson and his agent leaving voice messages demanding he attend practice.
King was irrate pacing the sidelines of the PCOM practice site when head coach Maurice Cheeks and assistant coach Jim Lynam sat the coach down.

"Billy you traded Allen during last season, he plays in Denver now," Lynam explained to the GM.

King smiled in embarrassment trying to recall the trade. "I think I remember...wait...get out of here. You guys are crazy. He's skipping practice again," said a laughing King.

King had this to say about the firing:"We're talking about attendance. Attendance. Attendance. We're not talking about games. We're talking about attendance. Attendance. Not games. Not games. Attendance. Attendance. We're talking about attendance."

Scheduling glitch unfortunatley has Sixers playing half their games at home in '07-'08