A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond. (All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Friday, February 27, 2009
Cover of stamp booklet mailed, now even more worthless
A desperate Kevin Berret, 39, of Pennsport (Phila), PA needed a single stamp to mail an almost-belated birthday card to his mother. As he opened his wallet, standing next to the neighborhood mailbox, he had a feeling that he had recently used the last remaining stamp from a book he purchased over three weeks ago. His hunch was correct.
All that remained of the Forever (Liberty Bell) double sided convertible booklet of 20 self-adhesive stamps were the 20 empty slots. Berret folded the booklet and placed the wax paper remnants into his wallet telling himself to 'think dammit.'
"At first I was like 'gaul dangit.' I was desperate and I was on my way to work with no time to stop at the Post Office. I just kept saying, 'get a hold of yourself.'"
His Center City bound bus was fast approaching the crowded stop and Berret was beginning to get frantic. It was then that he realized the empty booklet wasn't all together empty. He quickly fished for the booklet and staring him right in the eye (sun glare forced him to close his other eye) was the "21st Stamp."
Berret had heard stories about the "21 Stamp" but had never actually dared to use it. The cover from a self-adhesive book of stamps is quietly know as the "21st Stamp." It is not a stamp at all and pictures, in this case, a Liberty Bell, is four times the size of a normal stamp and displays a bar code. Often given to children as a toy sticker, the cover is worthless and mailing it further diminishes its value.
Berret hastily peeled the cover from the booklet, placed it on the envelop and dropped the card into the mailbox. The sound of his mail colliding with envelopes affixed with regular sized, bar code-less stamps sent his heartbeat racing.
"I got onto the bus and I could tell that everybody knew that I mailed the "21st Stamp." I could just feel it. I was sweating profusely. Could [the U.S. Post Office] track me by the bar code? I could see the on-duty mailman calling for backup once he discovered the stamp."
Several days later Berret's mother phoned to thank him for the card as this confirmed the cover from a book of self-adhesive stamps was mailed, and accepted, by the U.S. Post Office. The Center City architect let out a huge sigh.
"I am never doing that again."
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