A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond.
(All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Saturday, November 1, 2014
World Series: Pence, Bumgarner urging celebrating Giants fans to disperse from overloaded Golden Gate Bridge
Above: Social media led hundreds of thousands of Giants fans to converge on the Golden Gate Bridge soon after the team's victory parade ended in downtown San Francisco on Friday, October 31, 2014. Engineers became concerned after the curved roadway began to flatten and pleaded with authorities to disperse the crowd as quickly as possible. San Francisco Police and Marin County officials called on Giants players to help out and ask the fanatics to peacefully vacate the 77-year-old suspension bridge. Outfielder Hunter Pence and pitcher Madison Bumgarner appeared in a 60-second television public service announcement earlier today: "Hey, guys. Yeah, you guys on the bridge. We want you all to enjoy the World Series and celebrate responsibly. So, could you do us a favor and get off the bridge. Please, get off the bridge. All you have to is...get off the bridge. Hey, you there on the bridge...get off the bridge." The two stars of the championship series then turned "Get off the Bridge" into a catchy jingle and promised "Get off the Bridge" t-shirts for all who...get off the bridge.