A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond.
(All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Remaining Marlins change team meeting spot from exclusive South Beach restaurant to Doral, FL, Applebee's
Doral, FL--After a blockbuster trade sent the Miami Marlins' highest paid players to Toronto on Tuesday, those left behind in Florida decided to hold a team meeting in order to gauge overall morale. The gathering was originally planned for Prime One Twelve, a high-priced steakhouse on Ocean Drive in ritzy South Beach that the underperforming team visited often over the long, hot 2012 summer. In fact, the high-end establishment was a favorite of the players that now find themselves on the Blue Jays and who would "almost always" pick up the tab during these expensive outings. For this reason--most likely--the team changed yesterday's meeting spot from South Beach to the Applebee's west of downtown and out past the airport. "I can't believe we're eating out by the airport. 2013 is gonna be a lot different," said one Marlin on condition of anonymity.