A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond. (All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
RBS will not rename stadium but...
An excited Steve Vorgan, president of Citizens Bank Park, announced today that Royal Bank of Scotland(RSB) will not rename the stadium in south Philadelphia. There was speculation recently that RBS, which owns Citizens Bank, would change the name to better represent the RBS brand. Reports surfaced that RBS Citizens Bank Park would be the new name.
William Wallace, CEO of RBS, said,"There will be no name change, but it is with great pleasure I announce the first ever relocation of a sporting stadium."
Many at the meeting pleaded for him to repeat the announcement because his thick Scottish accent was difficult to clearly understand. Citizens Bank Park will be disassembled, shipped and reconstructed along the banks of the Clyde River in Glasgow, Scotland, where many believe baseball started.
Stadium relocation has been discussed for years, some often wondering what would come first: relocation or retractable-roof indoor stadiums. Well, now we know.
RBS originally thought about including the Phillies in the relocation, but said,"Naaaa, that's OK." Plans are to use the stadium for soccer, the Scotish games, which are just called 'games' in Scotland and wiffle ball tournaments.
Notes:The Phillies will share Lincoln Financial Field with the Eagles. "Yes, left field will be very, very short," said Phils president David Montgomery.
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