Thursday, January 31, 2008
Retractable field or stadium? Intoxicated engineers reveal
On Sunday the first Super Bowl ever to be played on a retractable field will take place in Glendale, AZ. The engineers and architects of the two year old stadium will be special guests of the city of Glendale for the championship game.
Though in the spotlight when the venue opened in 2006, the Super Bowl has put the engineering marvel back in the public eye on a grand scale.
Many from the design team appeared to celebrate the week's festivities a bit too much by showing up to a press conference a bit intoxicated. Cliven Van Linshtiln, lead engineer of University of Phoenix Stadium, revealed that he originally called for the field to remain fixed and the entire stadium to move.
"I have to admit I messed up the original plan. I did some bad math and somehow calculated it would be cheaper to have a retractable stadium rather than a retractable field," said Van Linshtiln to the media gathering.
The other designers, holding bottles of Coors Original Banquet Beer, laughed as the head engineer made his original plan public to the media. If this plan had been carried out it would have surpassed $8 billion.
"When Cliven informed us of the plan a few years ago we[design team] looked at each other incredulously," said team member, Gilkin Hoffton.
The plan was not changed until Linshtiln himself caught the mistake a week after ground had broken.
"We were all scared of the guy and didn't want to question his calculations. I mean this is Cliven Van Linshtiln for &%#$ sake," slurred Hoffton.