A satirical look at the Philadelphia region and beyond. (All stories are fabricated, with no basis on fact.)
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Weather forces Mummers into subway tunnel
The inclement weather this morning did not affect the starting time of the 2008 Mummers Parade in Philadelphia. For weeks the plan called for the parade to move underground in the case of rain or snow. The marchers strutted their way beneath the street in the Broad Street subway line from South Philly to City Hall. "Septa was very cooperative and gracious and stopped the trains until the weather finally broke," said Dave Santino, Captain of the Rittenhouse Ragers Brigade.
Mummers danced and played music in the tunnel while onlookers gathered along the tracks at numerous subway stations. Septa still charged customers entering the station even though there would be no travels. Combustion engines are prohibited from entering the subway thus preventing any of the Mummers support vehicles from following. "It was a bit weird being in the tunnel and pounding beers. We all kept tripping on the rails and ties," said Mummer Dan Fulton, of Pennsport. One fan put a scare into the Oil Refinery Brigade by blowing a massive train horn and sending its members into a mad scramble. By late morning the rain stopped and Mummers and revelers moved to the surface.
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